Being Nice Never Hurt Anyone

One of the perks of getting older is the opportunity afforded to keep learning. My curiosity never abates, so I'm always on the hunt for new knowledge and deeper levels of understanding (I just find it so darn rewarding whenever I come across new insights that I can incorporate into my worldview).

Of late, I've been using this blog (and other social media forums) as an outlet to share what I've learned about marketing, graphic-design and communications (obvious areas to focus on given my professional choices), but it occurs to me that I also have an opportunity to talk more broadly.

Today, I want to talk about one of the most important lessons I've learned. A lesson so profound, that it impacts every aspect of my waking life - personally and professionally. I'm talking about how you treat others around you. Okay, I'm not the first person to talk about this - that's obvious. And there are clearly countless experts who can give far better voice to this subject than I ever could, but given how impactful this topic has been to me personally, I can't shake the sense of obligation to talk about it.

"Being Nice Never Hurt Anyone" - you've all heard this phrase. I'm not sure who coined it originally, but does it really matter? The fact is, it's true. I really can't think of a single instance where making the conscious choice to be nice to someone ever resulted in a backlash. In fact, in my experience, it almost always generates tangible rewards. Let me explain.

Helping other generates its own rewards

Have you ever held a door open for someone? Most of the time, that simple gesture will result in a verbal or physical acknowledgement of appreciation - a "thank you" or smile usually. I don't know about you, but that momentary acknowledgement makes me feel good. Even if the person for whom I'm holding the door open passes through without acknowledgement, I still take solace from the fact I'm not like that person. It's a win anyway you look at it.

From time-to-time (though not near frequently enough), you'll hear the media report on a phenomenon known as "pay it forward". There are many iterations of this, but here in Canada, the most widely reported involves the institution known as Tim Horton's - as well known for its long line-ups through the drive-through, as it is for its coffee, donuts and sandwiches. What happens is that upon reaching the cashier window, a customer will not only pay for his own order, but that of the person immediately behind him. Imagine the surprise when it's your turn to pay, only to have the cashier tell you your order was already taken care of? In Winnipeg recently, this behavior triggered an unprecedented 3-hour marathon of "pay it forward" transactions at one particular Tim Horton's location. The story both startled and amazed Canadians across the country.

How does something like this happen? Well, it's not that complex. Going out of your way to do something nice or unexpected, even for complete strangers, has its own set of tangible rewards. In the case of Tim Horton's, the paying patron is denied the opportunity to see the immediate reaction of the customer behind them, but gets to imagine their response, based on their own experience of having been the recipient of somebody else's generosity. That's "feel good city" - and rewarding by anyone's definition!

By no means is being nice to someone the exclusive domain of individuals. I read recently where a Chili's restaurant went out of its way to accommodate the needs of a young autistic customer. The story as reported goes like this: Chili's institutes a policy of slicing hamburgers from the children's menu into two halves (for easier consumption). To 7-year old Arianna Hill however, the appearance of the hamburger was akin to being "broken", resulting in untold distress. To their credit, the Chili's server and her manager swung into action offering not only to repair the "broken hamburger", but also proffering a complementary plate of french fries while "repairs" were being effected. The result? Crisis averted and an ecstatic Arianna Hill, whose visage of her kissing the replacement hamburger immediately went viral.

7-year old Arianna Hill at Chili's Restaurant

Don't think for a moment that the happiness surrounding this moment was contained to young Arianna. I can assure you that everyone involved in this story took something positive away from the incident.

Terry O'Reilly, whose fantastic marketing radio show "Under the Influence", recently spoke of many such stories with similar outcomes. If you can spare a few minutes, pop on over to his website to read of other such inspirational tales in the corporate world.

The point is, whether in business, or in your personal life, going out of your way to help or be nice to others comes with its own set of rewards. Most of the time, it'll just be a warm fuzzy feeling, but every now and then fate will return the favor big-time. In the case of Chili's, they couldn't have scripted the story of Arianna Hill or possibly planned for what happened, but the quick-thinking actions of a few kind-hearted employees, not only made one little girl's day, but in its wake brought forth a tidal wave of goodwill for the entire restaurant chain.

I'm not overly spiritual, but I do believe in Karma. Over the years, I've learned to be more tolerant and respectful of other people - even those I don't know personally or professionally. My only motivation in holding that door open is to experience that brief moment of appreciation from the person walking through. It may not always come, but if nothing else, I feel good about who I am at that precise moment - and I always half-joke with whoever's with me at the time, that I'm banking "Karma points". I say "half-joke" because I actually do believe that good things eventually come to those that go out of their way to do good things for others.

It seems to work for me, and it just might work for you.